My mama Always said......

If you don't have anything nice to say then don't say it at all.......

There are a few things that I am very passionate about and it goes without saying that adoption is one of those things, obviously. I hate to admit that many times I get very frustrated at certain situations, comments, and actions. I am a person who likes to be in control - in case you haven't figured that out! (hence, my I797c paperwork). I have learned through our adoption journey that that is NEVER the case. So my point here is that you cannot control other people; in what they say or do. For example, I get annoyed by that family on TV - the Duggars. I mean seriously?? 18 children by birth? I think they should have adopted since they are so passionate about children. But, this is the perfect example of how I cannot control others and that it is probably a downfall of mine that I feel like I can push adoption on other people. I am saying all of this because my very dear friend Lanetta has been very hurt by a comment left on her blog by an anonymous commenter. http://www.gobblefamilyadoption.blogspot.com/

She simply said that she cannot wait to "rescue and save" her babies. First of all let me start off by saying that she and I have been friends since we started our adoption process. Both of our dossiers were at the Consulate LAST May, only to be returned to our agency with a note saying that they were not accepting dossiers. So, my point being that we were both so close a whole year ago. The adoption process is very difficult, very draining, very exhausting. But, in the end what happens is parents find a child and a child finds a forever family. This person said that they did not feel like they were "rescuing" their son. But what I don't understand is does she think that it was ok for her son to grow up in an institution if she had not come to create her family? She then continues to say that she and her husband were "in need" of a child. I want people to understand that I don't think adoption is "saving and rescuing". Lanetta said that maybe she should have chosen other words; what I think is that her words were just misinterpreted. I 100% think that what is happening through adoption is LOVE. It is unconditional love. It is a conscious plan and effort. It is the creation of a family. I believe it is how God works through certain people.

What I want to say is that I think it is very mean to say what this person said. Secondly I want to point out how cowardly it is for them to do it without leaving their name. Shame on them. In my opinion blogs are meant for the enjoyment of reading what others have to say. If you don't like what someone thinks then just ignore it or stop reading. It is as simple as that.